Elephant Family
May/072
Yesterday morning, Ryan (my almost three-year-old son) was heading upstairs to get dressed. On his way, he found one of his little toy elephants. He has three of them: a daddy, a mommy, and a baby elephant. Somehow the baby elephant had made his way downstairs, while daddy and mommy were upstairs in Ryan's room. Ryan picked up the baby elephant, and then looked at me and said, "He needs to be with his family." And with that, Ryan carried baby elephant upstairs and there was a joyous elephant family reunion.
There was such a simple truth communicated in Ryan's statement. Families belong together. It's one of my core convictions. I'm a minister, but I'm a husband and a father first. Our church had a preaching minister before me. They'll have another one after me. But I am the only husband and father my family will ever have.
I'm far from perfect in figuring out how to balance family and ministry, but Ryan's statement did tell me that I'm doing something right. In his three-year-old mind, families belong together. His experience has taught him that. Ryan has a mommy and a daddy that love being home together as a family.
Ministry is incredibly busy. Because of the time-consuming nature of my job, there are times when I have to say "no" to something in ministry simply because I want to say "yes" to my family. That decision can cause problems in my ministry. It's hard to say "no" to something that a church member believes is important. However, it's just not possible to say "yes" to everything at church. If I did, I would always say "no" to my family.
In all honesty, spending time with my family is the greatest thing I can do for my ministry. It keeps me healthy and balanced. If I find myself spending too many hours at church, my equilibrium gets altered. My ability to preach and teach with excellence, my passion to pastor our people, and my vision for the future of our church all are enhanced when I am spending quality time with my family.
As Ryan likes to say, "He should be with his family."
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8:28 am on May 9th, 2007
Great blog my friend! I really appreciated your words.
12:41 pm on May 9th, 2007
That must be a great feeling when you see your own child making a profound yet simplistic statement that is a direct result of your parenting. I find myself thinking about this very thing more and more every day. As ministers we need to make a commitment to our family and stick to it. I heard Andy Stanley speak at the Willow Creek Leadership Conference this year on "Cheating the Church". It was centered on how ministers, if swaying in one direction, need to cheat the church and not their family. Their ministries will be better for it. Great words man.